The following online journal entries are from March 1999.
They are taken from older version of my website.
"With the start of the new year, I started a new chapter in my life. After living in Maryland and the Washington, DC metropolitan area for twenty-eight years, I decided to make a change, to head for a different horizon, to embark on a great adventure. On January 5, 1999, I boarded a plane for San Francisco. In a matter of hours, I was on different soil and on a new path. Many of the entries from January to March are drawn from my written journal. I hope the best for my journey and I hope you find some pleasure and some power in reading about my travails. Cheers."
--from my last website, 1999
Tuesday. 12:21 PM. It has been a while since I have sat down with my journal and written about my life. Part of my life has been incredibly busy with getting settled and getting setup in the city that I haven't had the time.
The last couple of weeks has been up and down and down and up and sideways. On February 12, Sarah got her job at the Rose Resnick Lighthouse for the Blind. Then, we moved ahead with our application for the Mission apartment. Sarah started her job on the 16th -- Chinese New Year, heralding the Year of the Rabbit. On the 18th, we got the apartment, signed a year lease, and got our keys. We didn't move into the apartment till the following Monday. On the 22nd, Alenda flew out to SF and set up in Mountain View for her job. Sarah and I moved into the apartment on Monday night sleeping on our mattresses in a near empty apartment.
The apartment is slowly coming together. We are finally getting all the pieces we need. We both bought chestbeds. We got some furniture from Office Depot. Sarah got a monster desk that took us three hours to put together. We bought a futon for the living room, a new 27" TV, a VCR, and a small stereo. We have been spending way too much money. It's actually pretty scary. But, I am trying not to worry about it. We'll survive. I'll survive. I bought a brand new computer from Gateway -- I got the really cute cow-print boxes. I'm happy to be online again. I really hated spending so much money though. Crazy. Now, I just have to set up my room in a cool way. Then I'll be really happy. I think I'm going to buy an aquarium. I need fish. I want living things around me. In fact, I have been in such a nurturing mood that I really enjoy planting things and getting new houseplants for the flat. I want lots of green things.
Saturday. 3:09 PM. I went down to Espresso Bravo again. I had a super falafel sandwich from Ali Baba's down the street and an orange soda. Just trying to relax. Have a clear head. Don't want to sit in the apartment just yet. Tara came in last night. She's on Spring Break. So, she's going to be in the city for ten days. Sarah is going to be very busy with her. I need to work on my attitude toward the both of them. I guess I'm just jealous and I get resentful when I'm playing the third wheel. I really hate being the tagalong.
Tuesday. 3:06 PM. I went to Espresso Bravo again. As always, I went there to hang out. It was a nice day and I thought I should get out of the apartment. I am really itching to get more of my room set up. But, I really need to go shopping. I need to buy drawer units for my desk. I really need drawers to put stuff into -- and file cabinets or at least file boxes.
I have been okay. A bit better in spirit. I guess I have been trying to get myself in a better mood. I have been trying to just let go and stop creating my own misery. I have been hanging out with myself a lot. That's totally okay. Sarah and Tara have been keeping each other pretty entertained. I just let them do what they want to do. If I feel like hanging out with them, then I do. If not, then I just chill on my own.
Yesterday, I hiked all over the Mission trying to find the local post office. I walked all the way up to where Mission and South Van Ness intersect. I thought it was up there because the post office information line representative said so. Turns out it was not. I ended up walking down South Van Ness till I found the office. Of course, it's at South Van Ness and 23rd -- 4 blocks from my apartment. It was an adventure I guess.
Tuesday. 12:25 PM. Another week. I need to find a job soon. It's almost bill time. I don't want to run out of money. It is scary how much debt I am in -- especially after getting settled out here. Crazy.
I had a pretty good weekend after a pretty lousy week.
I spent most of my time by myself. That's okay. I will learn to cope and go on. Saturday was uneventful. Sunday was much better. Alenda drove up and picked me up. We went back down to Mountain View. We went shopping at Target and Pier One and Frys. It was cool. I got to see her office. It was very swanky, very corporate. I saw Ben. I met one of their co-workers named Sid -- he's really cute; a British punk boy. I saw Alenda's apartment. It was also very swanky. I made fun of her because she's being so totally bourgeois and yuppie.
I had a really good day with her. A really good day. We had lunch at a restaurant called La Tomatina. It was nice to be out of the house. It was nice to be with someone different. I really hope we can hang out some more. Too bad she's all the way down in the middle of Silicon Valley. Alenda is doing all right. She's stressed a bit. She's trying to get settled, too.
I need to get stuff sorted out. Dadi has sent me more stuff. That's a good thing. I got one of the boxes today. That's cool. Now, I need to do a bit more shopping. I need some shelves. Then I'll be pretty much set. It'll be good.
I have been working on my webpage. I am updating it. Hopefully, I'll get it done.
Next, I have to get a job. I've been looking. I need to send some resumes out. I hope I get a job that is totally cool. It'll make me happy. Very much so.
Wednesday. 9:40 AM. The last day of March. Crazy. Almost three months here in The City. Things are going well, I suppose. Unfortunately, I'm a bit under the weather right now. The flu has been trying to take over my body and I've been trying to fight it. I'm not sure I'm winning. I hate being sick. It's absolutely the worse thing. Any kind of dis-ease is just awful. I'm midly fevery, achy in the joints, have absolutely no energy, listless, broke out in cold sores (evil, evil, evil), and have a sore throat. I'm afraid if I get my chronic tonsilitis back, I don't know where I'm going to go for medical attention. Ahh, the life of the transient and unemployed.
I hate the end of the month because I have to pay bills. Ugh. I'm much poorer now. But, April is paid for. Now, I get to look forward to doing my taxes. Hooray. That's definitely going to kill me. But I will muddle on.
I'm not sure this is the best thing to do right now. Journaling while grumpy and yucky don't make for very good entries.
But I wanted to round out this month at least.
My room is finally shaping up. I've got all the furniture I need, I think. I have two long tables serving as desks. Shelves. Drawer units. One of those basket organizer things (which I thrifted for pennies). A full sized chest bed. Two ladder shelves (they're cool because they lean against the wall as support for the shelves). A small dresser and on top a twenty-five gallon tall fish tank. I just bought 4 channel catfish yesterday -- two are bluish and two are albino. They're pretty cool. I've decided that my color scheme for the room will be blue (dark blue, cobalt, any rich jewel blue), silver (or gray), with a little black and white. It's coming together and that makes me happy.
Anyway, I'll write more later when I can. And I hope to have a bit more to say.
© 2001 Edmond Y. Chang. All original material. All rights reserved.
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